A Spoonful of Sugar

Last week I was walking my charges back to their home from swimming lessons. The swimming lessons are pretty bad as one of the kids has weird body issues and water phobia, and the chance of a very serious, very public tantrum is always very high - I seem to have developed Thursdayphobia as a result. Anyways, the lessons had gone well, and we narrowly avoided tantrums, so things were going a-okay. As we crossed the park that fronts the village they live in, I noticed an ambulance parked outside the gate. The paramedics looked concerned, but were obviously waiting for something. We turned the corner and suddenly there are a lot of policemen milling about. By a lot, I mean 5 or 6, which is quite a few for a quiet little park. And if it catches my attention, you can bet that the kids noticed. "What are the policemen doing?" "Why are there cones around that tree?" "Ooh, here comes a van, somebody's in trouble," and so on.

Sure enough something catches my eye and I turn and look to find a man slumped against a tree, with 2 police officers standing right by him. There are traffic cones surrounding him and the police look slightly uneasy and aren't really dealing with this guy. It then occurs to me that the slumped over man actually looks kind of dead, and I let out a not-quiet-enough "Oh sweet lord" - which of course the kids to totally notice (as only kids can do). They look where I was looking and say "Do you think he's dead?!"

Now, here I have two options - I can either tell them exactly what I think, or hedge the question a bit and come up with something else. But what are the alternative possibilities? I mean, it's not like this guy is taking a nap. The kids can see quite obviously that something is up. If I don't tell them exactly what I think, and instead come up with a nice glossy story, they'll think I'm a big fat liar who treats them like babies (kids don't do understatement).

So I tell them. "Children, I believe that is a dead man". Now here's what I wasn't prepared for: "COOL!! Our first dead person!!!" Kiddos say what? They were *fascinated*. They wanted to know what I thought he died of, how long he'd been there, what would happen once the police took him away and a hundred other questions. It was like they were watching CSI: Cambridge. Of course as soon as their parents got home, they ran up to them and announced "We saw a dead guy! Emily said he was dead!". Great, I love getting credit, thanks kids.

As with much of my nannying experience, I thought WWMPD - What Would Mary Poppins Do? It doesn't actually help in any way, but it does make the whole experience slightly more amusing. My kids are in no way like the Banks children and I'm no Mary Poppins. We sure as hell don't sing and dance together, and, believe it or not, none of my friends are Cockney chimneysweeps. When we went to London, instead of touring the rooftops, we went to Harrods and ate at a trendy sushi bar. Maybe I'm just a 21st century Mary Poppins.

Next week is my last full week of work, as I'm having to quit so I can focus on exams. It's been an adventure, and I'm glad I've done it, but I'll be happy when that chapter finishes. Chim Chim Cher-ee.